Family Obsessions

Thanks be to my Christian AND reincarnation beliefs, as they keep me grounded. I have come to realize that biological parents are merely the vessels through which I enter my current life. Other people in my life have filled the truer roles of "mother," "father," "sibling," etc., and they have no biological connection.

It is human nature to desire what we don't have. The Beaver Cleaver family kids have an attraction to some degree to the non-Beaver Cleaver family kids, and vice versa. "Good girls" find "bad boys" exciting. "Bad girls" look for the security of the "good boys." "Good boys" try to save "bad girls," and "bad boys" ... well, let's not even go there. Through maturity comes appreciation for what we have, even when it is not our preference. It gives meaning, sense, and VALUE to everyone and everything with whom and which we come into contact. My current lot in life is my stepping stone towards the ideal I will reach in my final life.

Reincarnation might be an actual physical death of this shell and a subsequent new life in a new shell further down the road, or reincarnation may be start with tomorrow's dawn. Through learning and understanding, I now know what people mean who believe that we choose our mothers, fathers, and siblings. It is not my death and then a search for a barren womb to begin my next life; rather, it is me making that choice in the here and now. My "mother" is a dear lady named Ginny. My "father" was a wonderful old Greek man who lived in CT. My "sisters" and "brothers" (even though I have no biological brothers) are a special few who God placed in my life to adopt me as their sister. Upon reaching this level of personal growth, the family obsessions and haunts will back off because, in reality, they are only a figment of imaginations and a distortion of the real definition of "family." The "ideal family" that is biologically related simply happens to be a group of people who are already compatible and suited for their roles within that family's structure.

Those are my beliefs, and they may or may not be right or accurate; but they serve me well.

Maeke ErmarthãOcean City, MD
               April 28, 2012